Match Report

14/07/2013 v Wadhurst


Old fashioned draw frustrates McArdle

It was a sunny day on Sunday. I note this because it is the UK and finding the sun is like seeking a woman that doesnít moan. The oppo being weak decided we should bat regardless of the toss, nonetheless Jason loss the toss. The useless tosser joke seems to be getting weak but yet the sentiment only grows stronger. The new boy George (not new Boy George) opened the batting with Sam, put in a solid display and got us off to a tidy start. Eventually out for a decent 30 ish was followed by Jason who decided to take a run that wasnít there. Hilarity ensued when both Sam and Jason found themselves in the middle of the wicket and then started a sprint to get back into the same crease, the loser being the one that was given out. Sam was having none of the shenanigans and sprinted like someone had just accosted his girlfriend (no evidence he has one by the way). I followed out to bat after Jason got out. I stayed there for a while as a result of their being a drinks break inbetween my going out and my getting out. Iím less confused by quantum physics than I am my batting. F***k knows whatís going on. I used to be a batsman, Iím now a fielder! With Sam out caught (on the third time of asking) Tony stepped up the plate and delivered a competent display that defied his grey hair! Sam came off the pitch having scored 75 berating himself for being shit. My immediate retort was How do you think I feel We batted down the order with an impressive effort by Mitch, Pete and Max (Max - batting only). Accruing something around the 230 mark, the oppo knew they had no chance. It was a timed game, the youngsters yawned, the middle aged Tim decried, and the older Jason told us how much he loved real cricket..... It was like listening to Adam go on! A valiant effort saw us take 8 wickets but alas not the final two. Special mention for Pete for his 3 wickets, Max (who I rate very highly normally) having a frigging Ďshockerí of proportions only normally seen on the national grid, Mitchell for his first wicket and massively improving on his bowling last game and the umpire for making decisions more akin to a Zimbabwean national election that a game of Sunday cricket. If it was Zimbabwe, Jason would have been shot for dissent, thank goodness this was Kent! So the end result a snore draw. Someone mentioned moral victory. Testicles! Moral victories last minutes, the record book show draw and therefore no one wins a biscuit.... just the way the old players like it! Still undefeated for several games though. Charlatans next......

v Wadhurst 130 for 8



Sam Field




G Wood


Jason Allen




T McArdle


Tony Day


R Moore


M Higgs




Max Maynard

26 *



Pete Smith

11 *



Billy Merrill



T Froggat



228 FOR 7 ---drew